Happy "birthday" in heaven

Sept. 1 would have been your due date.

I would have probably been HUGE by now (if we didn't already hold you in our arms, because 2 of your 3 siblings came early!) and eager to see your beautiful face. So many new baby photos are circulating through my FB feed this week and I'm sooo happy for each of those families. Babies are such a blessing from God. <3

But it hurts too. It really does. I'll admit it.

I don't understand why God called you home so little. But I've come to realize that I don't HAVE to. I trust my God. I've seen what He can do. He saw fit to create you and it wasn't an accident. He made you perfect in his sight, even though doctors are convinced something was "wrong with you and this was meant to be." You fulfilled your purpose here on earth...maybe it was just to remind us all how brief and precious life is. Maybe not to take a healthy, easy pregnancy for granted. Maybe to be okay with grieving your baby -- you don't have to be strong all the time.

My greatest comfort is that I know He loves you even more than I do, and decided that 12+ weeks was just enough time for you to be with us, even though many would say you never existed, you weren't even a baby yet.

But I know better. I think every mom truly knows. I am so thankful for you.

One day we'll see you, for the first time, in heaven. I can't WAIT! I'm convinced you're a little girl, but I could be wrong. And I'd be okay with that.

Have fun with your sweet cousins up there on your "birthday" tomorrow.
We love you so much.